My latest submission to be published in JPG magazine. Go vote. :)

. . .

in the past year...

i moved to florida to be with someone i thought i could trust
and was told 2.5 months later that i had to leave. (and just a day after he had told me the engagement ring was coming...)

lost my apartment in cincinnati
had several financial problems arise indirectly from said "move"
lost a very dear friend to cancer
permanent injuries in a car accident that affects my daily life
had someone come into apartment via the window while i was sleeping and take my things
wreck my car and have no idea how i'm gonna get another one...

that's all i can really think of right now. i give up.

uncle.

I'm not really sure what I'm gonna say... I know what I want/need to say but I'm not sure I have the courage.

I know I'm listening to some songs that make me wanna create in some beautiful way and never look back.
I'm tired of hiding. Tired of the push and pull. I want to be at peace. I want to tell the whole world what I've been through in the last year. I want you to see it and then erase it and take it all back. Looking back is just as hard as looking forward. Or maybe it's the other way around. I don't want attention or pity. I want justice and the kind of love you spoke of in the evenings on the porch.
Maybe it will all just wash away.

God, let it be.

. . .

i just want to know why. and how.

i'm so tired.
weary, even.

words, and moments. daily reminders. memories. pain. promises. hate. lies?

God, send your angels down. Mercy. peace, please.



. . .

first art show last weekend.
awesome. met some really cool folks, had a lot of interest, got my name out, sold some prints.
massage is going okay... i'm building my clientele... hoping to make more money soon...
ran into the Bambino last week... he said i did awesome on my first "shoot"...
now waiting to hear back from him...waiting for the wedding season to begin.
i joined 'Give Back Cincinnati' and did my first charity event last weekend... it was amazing.
it's warm outside. :)
music is existence.
ray lamontagne, gillian welch, frontier folk nebraska, blue-grass....
hoping for justice,
living in the moment...
trying to be a better person all the time.
i like dirty martinis now.
i've got some portrait shoots on the horizon.
i'm doing yoga. (when i can... car accident has put a damper on it, at the moment)
someone is making me smile...
still trying to come up with a good 6-word memoir.

life is.... what it is.

kinda feel like falling in love with everything i see.

. . .